sawdoctor who crossover
by rubygirl25
Summary: "One time lord, with everything to loose. Let the games begin" Billy cackled.   the doctor wakes up in a abandoned slaughter house, with no idea how he got there. he must race against time to save himself and his closest companions from a painful death.
1. Chapter 1

The dying bulb glimmered faintly. Sparks spat, clocks ticking, where was he? Everything was drifting lazily in and out of focus. His head pulsed with a dull, thought drowning rhythm. Head swimming, the doctor could faintly hear a warped voice. It was calling his name. What had he done this time? Had he insulted an angered slitheen? He sniffed the thick hot air. No, he couldn't have, it smelt nothing like slitheen farts. It was the smell of fear: rusting metal, sweat and blood, the smell of a slaughter house.

Something wasn't right, no, worse than that, something had gone awfully wrong.

He opened his eyes wide, dilated pupils darted around the room. Where – and when- was he? In the corner of his eye, he saw something, something really bad. Something so bad only 2 words popped up in his head to describe it: oh no.

The voice was becoming clear now, frantic, tearful gasps, a woman pleading for his help.

"doctor-" she gulped, red hair shrouding her tear streaked face

"help-" she suppressed a sob

"help me, doctor"

"I'm….. so scared-" this time the sob escaped her lips, a half shriek of frustration, half a wail, bounced off the walls assaulting the doctors ears.

The doctor attempted to jump up, but then he realised. He was strapped to a cold metal chair, by two leather straps, there was a dull metal clag as his head hit cast iron metal.

"doctor-" Amy whispered Horsley, gulping down another sob.

Amy looked like a mad man's sick vision of a angel. Some cold steel claws were clamped around her delicate little rib cage, piercing more than the skin. Every time she wheezed another breath he could tell it was going a little deeper. She looked so fragile, face paler than white, hair frizzed and tangled. He feared if he touched her, she would shatter into a thousand pieces. Her hands chained high above her head. And her feet tightly chained at the ankle.

"are you okay?" Amy asked tentatively.

The doctor tried to talk, but there was something in his mouth, like a horse rider's bit. He could taste foul rusty metal. For the first time he realised that he had something round his hear, a helmet perhaps? No, couldn't be. Helmets didn't probe your mouth. His lips were incased in dirty brown metal.

"aaammmyph" he shouted, not perfectly coherent, but just about good enough to communicate.

"whats going on?" she asked.

"I donnnoo" he mumbled through his teeth.

Suddenly there was a click, and a projector came on, painting a pale white image on the wall opposite.

After a couple of seconds of spluttering the movie began to play. A puppet sat facing him, the movie spattered with black spots. He had jagged red spirals painted on the cheeks on his otherwise pure white face. Ruby red eyes stared mockingly at him, bushy black hair framed his face, and ears completely absent.

"hello doctor, I wanna play a game" Billy chuckled

Freezing cold sweat was visible on what Amy could see of his forehead.

" for the past decade, I thought you were some sort of folk tale, a fairy story, the man with the changing faces, travelling through space in a telephone box, too good to be true -or so I thought-. But you are far more than just a magician and ladies man, you're an alien, the very last of you're kind. you have spent almost a whole millennia travelling time and space, but you have always felt slightly smug, where ever you go, you have see things that most humans don't even dream of, not even in their darkest nightmares. You are here because you have never felt truly scared, a thousand years of travelling and you have never feared for your life. I am challenging you with the most complex traps I have ever devised, that is, if you survive the first." Billy grinned, staring into the doctor's soul.

"You see, it's not just you and Amelia in this building, some of your closest companions you will find throughout the slaughter house. In case you're wondering, you're tardis is just outside, yours to take. But you will only be released when you have attempted all the challenges set for you. Don't, bother to try and break open windows and doors, they are reinforced, and, just to make sure you play fair, I have taken your screwdriver and any other equipment which is not 'of this world'. Don't worry, your equipment will be safely found withing the tardis, if you get out alive"

"Around your head right now is one of my most infamous creations, the reverse bear trap. you probably know, but your friend probably doesn't, after a certain amount of time this will happen" the camera rotated an extra 20 degrees to reveal what appeared to be an ordinary bear trap, apart from it had a couple of extra rings on metal an gears.

"amy, dunn loo" the doctor ordered, but Amy simply ignored him, not even acknowledging him with a glance. Billy the puppet flourished a tiny white arm up into the air, holding a long sharp stick.

Ever so tentatively he reached towards the seemingly harmless deactivated play thing.

"amy, loooo aawaaayy" he shouted angrily at her attempting to sound as clear as possible, but was pretty much impossible with a large ring of metal poking out of his mouth.

Finally Billy prodded the not so harmless toy with the tip of his stick, when suddenly, It bounced open with such force it jumped in to the air.

Amy couldn't speak, but her eyes said it all, it looked like she's just been into the fiery pits of hell and back. Her eyes glittered, fresh tears sitting on the surface of her eye. She kept crying, but this time she remained deathly silent, sobs stifled by sheer horror.

"as soon as this has finished you will have 5 minutes to remove the reverse bear trap, before that happens" Billy pointed to the 'idle plaything'

"One time lord, with everything to loose. Let the games begin" Billy cackled.

Then the screen went black.


	2. Chapter 2

The doctor sat, perfectly still for 10 agonising seconds. A timer ticked rapidly, situated right above his left ear. Had he given up? Immersed in thought, his brow furrowed, sweat trickled down his nose onto his dry chapped lips. His eyes glazed over, not a word escaped his lips. Amy thought he was dead, slumped, motionless in a chair, his eyes looked like they belonged to a dead fish. Precious seconds slipping through her fingers. Amy couldn't bare it.

"DOCTOR, DON'T JUST SIT THERE!" Amy shouted, but to no avail.

"I don't want you to die" she whispered, biting her lip so hard, soon she would be tearing right through it, trying to hold back anymore tears.

Jolting upwards, he easily freed his hands, from the confinements of the leather straps, so quickly it made Amy jump. Getting up from the chair, he felt around the trap which was wrapped securely around his head, so tight he could almost feel the unforgiving metal against his skull. He glared at the CCTV camera in the top right corner of the room, which he hadn't noticed before, he squinted at it, as though he could see someone at the other end, staring right back at him.

_Where's, the key? His victims always get a way out._ As quickly as he though that, he answered his own question. _Looks, like I'm going to have to dismantle this myself._ He could feel a fluent network of cogs on the back of his head, some as big as saucers, some as small ad wedding rings. He took a chance and yanked the biggest cog he could find. Unsurprisingly, the bear trap remained firm.

_There must be a weak spot, he wouldn't just let me die, that would be too easy, he wants to see me suffer first. _Amy couldn't stand, not being to go over to help him, he was going to die right in front of her eyes, and she couldn't to anything about it. Thrashing against her chained restraints, she knew it would be no use; all attempts to escape would be futile.

The doctor turned around to face away from Amy, he couldn't work efficiently when he was being distracted by a distraught red head. He glanced at his watch, _only 2 more minutes_.

The timer was ticking insistently, making it near impossible to think clearly. Relentlessly he tugged at all the cogs he could find, but, as far as he could tell, they were all perfectly meshed together. His mind whirring with thoughts of desperation. _He wouldn't put the weak spot somewhere obvious, where wouldn't I look, where could he have hidden the weak spot. _He tried tugging the handle which sat on the top of the helmet. But all he achieved was it tugging a bit of his hair out and making the bit dig deeper into his gums. Becoming more and more desperate he pulled harder, still hoping that somehow, it would brake. The truth was he needed nothing short of a miracle. He was getting more and more dizzy, more and more sick, he wasn't thinking straight, it was more important than ever that he thought quickly and clearly.

He half felt like turning around and telling Amy to shut up, though she wasn't saying anything at all, but her thoughts were too loud, and also he couldn't talk any more. His lip was curled upwards at an awkward angle, he looked even more like a horse, now all he needed was the buck teeth.

Checking his watch he realised he had wasted valuable time, and too much of it. _One minute left. he must be relishing this, watching me squirm, and my companion dying a little inside with every second that goes past. _

Something was digging into his ear, making it incredibly itchy. It felt like a mosquito bite._ I cant worry about that right now, not when I'm going to die in 40 seconds, no, make that 38. _he wracked his brains in frustration, _where would you hide a weak spot, where no one would_ see it, _somewhere hidden, somewhere that it would not be disturbed._ _Urrrrrrrmmmmmmmmm, hurry up, think of something, stupid idiot, how can you be a proper timelord if you cant get of of a trap like –OH- Oh, oh oh! It's so obvious, why didn't I think of that before? _

In one swift motion the doctor reached behind his itchy ear, and pulled out the cog, which had been nestled behind his ear. There was a dull thunk, then tinkling noises, as the cogs spilled onto the floor below, similar to the noise a wind chime makes or a breezy summer morning.

Quick as a flash, he pulled the deadly metal helmet off his head, and out of his mouth and hurled it at the wall opposite, Making a dent in the concrete wall. Surprisingly, quite a lot of the trap still remained intact, but it was off his head, that's what mattered.

Breathing in massive lung-fulls of air, but it was like trying to pump up a punctured balloon. He collapsed in a heap on the floor.

"Doctor…" amy sighed, staring at the emotionally shattered man, sprawled in a crumpled heap on the floor. But thankfully he was still breathing.

Suddenly there was a snapping sound, and the trap catapulted itself into the air, making all three hearts in the room stop momentarily. After about 10 seconds, he had got his breath back. Gripping the largest cog within arm's reach, he stood up to face the camera, which adjusted its zoom to stare him right in the face.

He glared at the camera, and after a momentous pause, he said

"I am not an animal in a zoo, here to play for your amusement, and neither are my friends," clear close to completely loosing his temper

"and I swear, when I find you, you will be the one looked in a cage for all to see".

Having said what he wanted to say, he lobbed to cog directly at the camera. It hit it right on the lens, the glass broke and the camera fell to the floor, a few sparks flew, before the camera completely died.

The doctor ran over to Amy, who still didn't quite believe he was alive

"I must be hallucinating; you were seconds away from getting your mouth torn open." She stared at him like a confused puppy, head tilted to one side.

The doctor looked into her eyes with intense scrutiny

"don't think you have concussion, but I cant be sure" the doctor mumbled, lifting up her eyelids briefly.

"now, answer me completely honestly," the doctor whispered in her ear "do you remember **anything** about what happened before we woke up here?"

"I remember…. I think we were eating at a diner" said amy

"what date was it?" the doctor questioned amy.

"it was, Easter…. Easter Sunday, we were stuffing our faces with Hershey's, remember?"

"That would mean it was….. The 27th, and today is, the 29th"

"So we were abducted 2 days ago"

"Wait, there was someone with us.. I can't remember who"

"Good point, where is Rory …."

"Oh my god, how could I forget" Amy said, completely shocked

"Don't worry, Amy, don't get stressed, you cant afford to," the doctor stared sternly at her.

"How could I not be worried? He's my husband!" Amy asked indignantly.

" I promise, I will find Rory, and save you're lives, " he looked deeply into her panic stricken eyes.

"pinky promise?" Amy challenged him.

" pinky promise" doctor said, deeply serious, lifting up his little finger for her to see.

In the corner of his eye he could see an envelope, which was just out of Amy's line of vision. He went over and picked it up.

"Where are you going" Amy said, frightened that he would leave her.

"No where, currently" replied the doctor, more focused on reading the letter.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm am looking to see if there is a way to easily get you out, without getting your chest ripped open"

"Is that supposed to make me feel better?"

"Yes"

"Well you're not doing a very good job at doing it!" Amy tutted.

The doctor extracted a small piece of lined paper from the envelope, the letter read:

Hello doctor,

Presuming you have completed you're first task and are reading this, you have managed to stay alive, which was pretty likely. You're companion is slowly dying, currently every time she inhales the claws get a tiny bit deeper, about half a millimetre, I expect. Within about an hour of you reading this her lungs, stomach, and liver will puncture, and she will die, slowly and painfully.

However, you can save Amelia ponds life. Enclosed in this the envelope is a key, that will allow you to enter the room on your right. But I warn you, your next challenge is to save someone you despise, someone who should have died a long time ago. You will find the precise information you need to save this being in the next room.

I look forward to seeing you there.

Jigsaw


	3. Chapter 3

Warily the doctor eyed the door, which was beckoning to him from across the room. Something was behind that door, something bad, and something that he must save in order to save Amy, which was being crushed with every breath she took. He had to save her, but by opening that one door he was committed to saving his, her or it's life.

Amy was getting suspicious, the doctor never goes silent for more than 30 seconds, and he hadn't spoken for a good 5 minutes. She couldn't see what he was up to, but whatever it was, she didn't like it. There was definitely something he was not telling her.

"What's going on doctor? Really?" she asked.

"Nothing," said the doctor, bluntly dismissing the question.

"You're a rubbish liar, you know" Amy argued.

"Seriously, I'm just finding a simple way of getting you out of there, and currently, you're not helping by arguing"

"Doctor, I'm not a child, and I'm most certainly not stupid," Amy hissed

"Now tell me, what really are you doing?"

"You have to trust me on this, pond," the doctor stated, preoccupied with planning

"I am doing what's best for you, and for us"

After a short pause, Amy retorted not being able to bare not knowing

"For Pete's sake, just tell me what you've found" Amy sighed

The doctor fell silent for a minute more, before telling her the truth.

"I've found a letter," the doctor confessed

"It's from someone called jigsaw, the person who put us in here, the person who was watching us through the camera."

"Why would he write you a letter?" Amy inquired.

"The letter has a key inside, and it says there is something waiting for me in the room behind you. "

"Then don't go, if you're so worried about it, it's not like you have to" she told him

"But the thing is pond, he says if I don't go and save what's in there… he will kill you." He said in the nicest way he could.

Amy froze, some how managing to get even paler than she was before.

She couldn't find any words worth saying; all she could do is bite her lip.

Feeling guilty, regretting that he had told her in the first place.

He could tell that she really needed a hug, but he couldn't, fearing that if he dared touch her delicate for she would get even closer to death.

"Amelia Jessica pond, do you remember when we were in the forest, with the angels" he said. Amy responded with a solemn nod.

"you had to walk through the forest, with both of you're eyes closed, I told you to do something, and now its more important than ever, tell me, what did I tell you to do?" he calmly whispered

"trust," she replied " you told me to trust you"

"you know, than I'd rather die, than see you get hurt," he said "that's why I'm going to go and face whatever's inside, and just call my name, and I will be there before you even know it, I've got to go pond, I really have, but I will honour my promise to you no matter what."

The doctor took one last glance at Amy, then put the key in the lock and opened the door. He closed the door as quietly as he could. Immediately spotting a tape player on the floor in the middle of the room, waiting for him. He scuttled forward, eyeing the shadows to see if something moved. Cautiously he lifted up the tape played and pressed play.

"_Hello again, doctor, doctor who?_

_You have travelled to the darkest of places, experienced complete and utter horror, but you don't bat an eyelid. You came here to save Amelia, and I promise you, the process of her untimely death has been halted, at least for now. Now turn around." _

The doctor pressed the pause button, and turned around. Resting in the corner of the room, shrouded in shadows, was the one thing the doctor wasn't expecting. Currently the only part of it visible, was an eyestalk, limp and lifeless, the rest was cloaked in darkness. Gradually the light grew to an unearthly brightness, shining light on the weak, dying dalek.

The doctor pressed play again, demanding answers.

_This robot was found by the FBI, approximately 4 years ago, after the aptly named, doomsday happened. Among the dead, he was discovered. Immediately he was transported to the USA for testing, where it remained for the past 3 and a half years. By then, they thought it had died, and the tossed it in an incinerator in a garbage tip. Incidentally, that was where I was working at the time, and when I returned to work at 4 o'clock in the morning, and I heard it screaming the most excruciating screams, so loud and high pitched if it had been a tiny bit higher, it would have been completely out of any humans hearing range. _

_I found it, broken and burnt, and you're job, doctor, is to fix it. You see, when I took it home to have a look at it, I discovered, it had a living organism inside of it, mutated, but alive, it cannot feel any emotions, apart from hatred and pain.. I have wired it up to a heart monitor, where it is in a critical but stable condition. I have placed electrodes in it's brain, that I hoped if the current was at the right strength, would make it able to feel, but it failed. But I hope you can do the job for me. I have supplied you with an ammeter, and a set of cutting tools and surgical wire. _

_But I must warn you, if the dalek flat lines, for more than 10 seconds, the claws in Amy's feeble ribcage will be ripped open from the inside out. If you choose not to start the game, the forfeit will be Amy's immediate death. However, also in its brain you will find a key, which you will find useful. Do you save them both, or kill them both? You decide. Let the games begin."_

The doctor, completely livid, threw the tape across the room, where it snapped with a loud crackle.

He located the camera in the corner of the room and said

"You have no idea what you've done, do you?" he whispered, being careful not to raise his voice.

"This one dalek could kill the whole population of New York by tomorrow morning, and would, if it had the chance"

"Why couldn't you just have left it to die?"

"This dalek was genetically engineered to fight, to kill and nothing else; it never was able to feel fear, or happiness or sadness, which was not its purpose. Couldn't you tell that from the laser shooter and plunger it has equipped? You are so lucky it hadn't murdered you already, if I was to make it better again, it would brake free, kill all of us in the building, go out on the street and shoot anyone on sight."

"I am not asking you to make it better, doctor, I am asking you to enable it to feel, and also you are forgetting your deal" a speaker echoes throughout the room

"You think this was a deal? You think I asked for me and my friends to take part in your sick little games?" he said, loosing his temper, he kicked the wall and then after a surge of horrible pain, and regretted it.

"Do you kill, or do you save? You choose"

Still infuriated the doctor went to talk to Amy. He shoved the door with his shoulder, and unfortunately the only thing he succeeded in doing was getting a ripe, purple bruise on his arm.

"Amy?" he roared banging the door, not even caring if he woke up the soundly sleeping dalek. There was no response, at first.

"pond, if you don't answer me right this second I will be forced to kick this door down, which I don't really fancy doing, as these are brand new shoes." He listened intently, her heard rustling noises, and then a slightly drowsy American voice responded

"Great, at last I've got some company" obviously preoccupied.

"What are you doing? Leave her alone" the doctor snarled

"Relax, I'm not laying a finger on your ginger girlfriend, she's probably just passed out from the chloroform. I'm just trying to get this goddamn collar off"

"Collar? What collar?"

"That A-hole jigsaw fitted me a razor collar, so now I have four razor blades stabbing into my neck"

"And you're not dead?"

"Do I sound like it? That was the third time I died this week, well, technically I am dead, so I can't die, so I guess you could say I'm immortal, kinky huh?"

"Harkness!"

"Yup, and who the hell are you?"


	4. Chapter 4

Flashback: 2 days ago

It was so dark, so dead. The air was ripe with pungent scent of rotting pig's entrails. Jack couldn't help but gag, but since he hadn't eaten any proper food in a month, he couldn't exactly vomit. Hunger burned his stomach like a red hot poker, and his throat burned from thirst. Couldn't he just die already? He was getting extremely bored, just sitting on a squalid bathroom floor. Blood stained the now brown bathroom tiles, the chain wrapped around his wrist drew blood, as it was wrapped so tightly, but he would never ever die. That's what made him the perfect test subject, the guinea pig. If he was able to die he would have died excess of 30 times in the last 6 months.

That was when he was taken, six infinitely long months ago. He had been sent on a private mission by torchwood, to investigate rumours of a tin robot being sighted in Ohio. There was a conversation between unit and the FBI, but they denied any knowledge of the tin robot. Naturally jack was chosen to inspect this case, being the most handsome, intelligent and brave of the candidates, if he dared say so himself. You get anywhere with a little charm, that was his motto, but for once, he wished he'd never applied for that task.

He said goodbye to Gwen, Ianto, owen and toshiko, assuming he's be back in about 2 weeks, a month tops. But nothing prepared him for what happened. He spent about a week following all possible leads he had been given by torchwood, but all leads were dead ends. This led him to inspect all prospective hideouts for the robot and maybe also its captors. He checked the homeless shelters, the drug trafficking hotspots of the state, and eventually even the brothels, which had gotten him into more than a few sticky situations, but in the end he had no such luck with finding the robot..

It was only when he was walking back to his hotel, at about 2 o'clock in the morning, about 2 weeks after he had arrived in the U.S. of A. he was more than a little tipsy, to say the least. On his merry way, while singing a grease anthem to himself, he managed to trip over a homeless guy's stash, breaking whatever was inside. He was not too pleased with jack, and consequently stabbed him with a pocket knife, right in the chest. Staggering home, jack ended up collapsing from blood loss in front of o local drugs clinic.

A weary old man was about to get into his truck and drive home, when he discovered jack, lying on the flood, face speared with his own blood. Being a 'nice old man' he turned jack onto his side. Feeling a very subtle pulse, that was so weak, if he had been an ordinary person, he most certainly would have died then and there.

The old man was just about to call for an ambulance, when jack regained consciousness, and with no trouble at all removed the blade from his chest, and proceeded to make his way home. The old man was so stunned jack thought he might have a heart attack. With a cheery wave, jack walked on the path of an oncoming car. The old man, surprisingly strong for his age pulled him out of the way.

"why don't you come and stay at my house for the night? It will be safer that way" he said, in a hollow rasp. Jack was cold, drunk and bathed in his own blood, how could he refuse? Without thinking he got into the strangers truck.

It was full of engineers tools, hack saws, buzz saws, welding tools, blow torches, you name it, it was somewhere in the pile of junk in the back. Not much conversation took place on the journey, which he could recall. It was quiet apart from the distant hum of the engine, the click of indicators and occasionally jack bursting out laughing, for no reason whatsoever. It was fair to say that the old man thought jack was wrong in the head, which would make him an easy target.

While jack was busy fiddling with a screwdriver, he found on the dashboard, the girl came out of her hiding place, at the back of the truck. Her greasy brown hair pulled back in a small ponytail. She had prominent cheekbones, which made her look frail, even skeletal and fat pink lips, curled into a grim fake smile.

Jack heard the sound of glugging water, but dismissed it, assuming it was just the old truck dying, but if he had been more aware of his surroundings, he would have noticed the girl, dousing a dirty, crinkled handkerchief with chloroform.

It was only half a second before she pounced that he noticed her reflection on the windscreen. But by then it was too late for him to struggle, the chemical shot up his nostrils, a dirty cloth and a hand firmly clamped over his mouth, she too, was abnormally strong for her stature. Quickly everything was reduced to unfocussed blurs and blobs, like he was looking through a kaleidoscope, his eyes stung and he had the overwhelming urge to sleep.

The screwdriver fell to the floor, his gut instinct told him to go for the door, bail out onto the road. But for one thing, a face-full or tarmac did not seem all that appealing, and secondly, the man was already one step ahead and had already locked the doors. He writhed in his seat, but gave in pretty quickly. The last thing he could remember of that night was hitting his head on the dashboard, and then waking up with a splitting headache afterwards, in the same bathroom he was in how.

His only company nowadays were cockroaches, which he regularly woke up covered in them, crawling alover his skin, which made it even more itchy. Now and again a spider would appear, in the corner of the room. The spindly spineless scrounger would skulk in the corner, and whenever a cockroach was stupid enough to wander into the shadows, it would snatch it and eat it whole, while 6 other eyes stared blankly at jack, eyes black and empty, staring right through him.

The only two people he had talked to in the past six months were the girl, who refused to expose her name, and jigsaw, the old man who took me in on that cold winters night.

He sees Amanda pretty much every other day, if he's lucky, she'll bring him a couple of slices of bread and butter, but it was a lot more likely that she came to drug him, and put him in his next 'game'. Jigsaw, he only see's when jack has to test a trap. He glides along, like he is not of this world, a crimson cape shields his face from view, and he only ever tells jack the rules of the game, before retreating into the safety of the camera room, where he can see what's going on, without having to get any blood on his hands.

Whenever he talks to jigsaw about why he is doing this, trying to get through to him, he just repeats the same 5 words, like a broken record. "it's for the greater good" every time he heard that phrase he got more and more furious. With every day, things got more and more hopeless.

That morning he tried that same old trick again. When Amanda came in, to give him some food, he grinned cheerily at her, and gave her a cheeky wink.

"you know, I wonder how with looks like that you could end up here?" the girl swaggered up to him. She had her hair up in the same ponytail she always had. She wore a tight green t-shirt, tight leather pants and long black boots to match

"you know you should try letting you're hair down more often" he said in a silky tone of voice " in more senses than one"

The girl sat down next to him, and offered him some chalk white bread.

"nah, I'll have some later," he purred and leaned in closer, now only about 5 inches from her face. She smiled, eyes sheepishly fixed on her feet.

"come on," he whispered in her ear "go with the flow" and without hesitation, he went in for the kill, he leaned forward, about to kiss her fat pink lips. Lips centimetres apart, just when he thought he'd gotten away with it, he received a huge slap around the face. She left the plate on the floor and went for the door.

"wait!" jack shouted, reaching out for her "how did you see through my cunning plan

"a man with a hair cut like that, who is glistening golden tanned, teeth, pearl whitened, and sings to himself" she explained "got to be gay"

He laughed, a hint of a blush showing up on his face

"well, I'm bi," he retorted "but close enough"

She smiled back at him, before going for the door.

"don't go" he pleaded "I'm so alone" on the verge of tears, but these ones weren't fake.

"well…" she said "there was one thing I would like to talk to you about"

"anything, what is it" he said, clearly desperate.

"what do you know about the doctor?"


	5. Chapter 5

"Im the doctor, and if you don't help me get this door open right now I will get very, very angry!" the doctor said through gritted teeth. He beat the door with his fist, but no matter how hard he tried, the door still remained completely intact, not a splinter appeared

"calm down doc," jack laughed "I wont let anybody near her, they would have to kill me first, and I can't die"

"I don't care, help my pull this door down, or there will be no jammy dodgers for you" he scolded jack

"what kind of doctor are you, a paediatrician or something? Because doctor what ever you're name is, frankly, I don't give a shit if I don't get any jammy dodgers" jack said, still remaining uncooperative.

"captain jack harkness," the doctor shouted " I have saved you're American arse twice as many times as you've saved mine, and this is when you return the favour. I am the doctor the oncoming storm and if you do not come and help me right this minute, the storm will be coming straight for you're sorry arse"

"for the doctor, you don't sound an awful lot like him" jack criticised the doctor

"well, new face, new voice" the doctor said indignantly.

The air was filled with laughter, as jack had a sudden laughing fit, he had a penetrating howling laugh, that was amplified by the cavernous room. The doctor was beginning to get very angry, and it took a lot to get him angry.

"STOP LAUGHING, IT'S NOT FUNNY" the doctor tried to remain serious, but jacks laugh was and always has been highly contagious. He also ended up slumped against the wall, trying to stop his sides from splitting. After about 5 minutes of non-stop laughter, they finally calmed down.

"and if you don't want any jammy dodgers it's you're loss, all the more for me" the doctor mumbled with a mouthful of biscuit.

"I'll have to pass on that one, thanks" jack replied, extracting a long metal razor, which was poking out of his neck

"tut tut harkness, I guess you just don't appreciate the finer things in life: jammy dodgers, Stetsons and the legendary bow tie" the doctor tutted, straightening his tie as he spoke.

"I don't know about that, I like Stetsons, Stetsons are cool, I've got a hot pink one in the back of my wardrobe, if there is one thing I can rock, it's a Stetson"

After an awkwardly long pause, the doctor broke the ice.

"If that's what you hide at the back of you're wardrobe, I dread to think what else is in there" the doctor stated.

"you don't wanna know doctor, you don't wanna know" jack said, the doctor couldn't see jack, but he could tell he was grinning his smug little face off.

"So, old chum, do you fancy helping push down this door?" the doctor asked.

"Chum?" jack asked "how much more British can you get? Next thing you're gonna tell me is that you've grown a beard"

"No, but I did have one once, and I dare say I looked quite fetching" the doctor scoffed in a very posh accent.

"But seriously, can you help me bash this door down?" the doctor

"Otherwise I'm going to end up dislocating my shoulder."

"Make way for the master" Harkness rubbed his hands together and swaggered over to the door.

"I strongly advise you do not attempt to open that door" jigsaw waffled through the speakers.

"Jigsaw," the doctor whispered very angrily, "there is nothing in the world that will stop me from opening that door."

Unwisely, the doctor stood in the doorway; face about 2cm away from the door. He promptly received a bash on the nose, which made sickening crunch of a sound

"Watch it" the doctor hissed, rubbing his sore nose, thankfully it hadn't started bleeding, yet. Splinters of wood were flying in all directions, dust clouds hung in the air. Slowly but steadily, the door was falling to pieces, the corners were the first to fracture and brake off, and then gradually eroded the rest of the door.

"How can you do that so easily, and I cant?" said the doctor, quite embarrassed.

"Well doc, I've been locked in a bathroom for the past six months, I thought it would be a good time to improve my physique" jack bragged. The doctor leaned on the wall, tapping his foot and whistling to himself while jack did the dirty work.

"Doctor?" came a rather uncertain, nervous voice.

"What is it Jack?" the doctor sighed

"That wasn't me, doc," jack declared "it looks like you're girlfriend is waking up"

"For you're information, he is not my boyfriend, I have a husband I'll have you know,"

"oooooooooohh! Doctor, get you!" jack whistled

"I mean, I knew you were a ladies man, but, get in there doctor!"

"Shut up, now let me see that face, I can't trust a voice, but I can trust a face" Amy commanded.

Jack sighed

"What the lady wants, the lady gets" jack said, not bothering to argue.

Jack came around from behind, stood in front of her and did a mock salute.

" captain jack harkness, at you're service, ma'am" jack laughed. Amy giggled in response.

"I tell you what it's a shame you're married, because if you weren't I'd take you on a date"

"are you done flirting yet, jack?" the doctor butted in

"nah, you've got to be gay" Amy said, trying to stop herself from laughing. But after seeing jack storm off in a huff, burst out laughing.

Jack, In a rather sulky mood, continued his work without saying a word, in fact, no one said a word for a while.

The doctor lazily gazed around the room, the dalek was still asleep, heart going at a slow but constant rate. There was another door, and the doctor assumed the key that was currently in the dalek brain open that very door.

Then the doctors eyes fell on some thin black wires, connected to the door hinges, and noticed the constant beeping noise, that wasn't the heart monitor, beeping with every second that went by, had gradually speeded up . Then the doctor remembered 2 very important things, two things that could potentially jeopardize the whole possibility of getting out alive:

The door must be wired up to some explosive device, which would detonate, as soon as that door collapsed. To deter him from going back to see Amy.

Dalek's don't sleep.

"JACK STOP," the doctor ordered "STOP, STOP, STOP"

"What?" jack sighed "I've spent a good 10 minutes trying to bash that door down, and now you're telling me to stop"

"I know, I know," the doctor replied " but see those wires poking out of the door, there is 90% chance is we bash that door down, a explosive will blow up in one of our faces, and I don't particularly want that and neither do you"

Backing away from the door and rubbing his arm, he wished he'd never started it, all that hard work had cost him quite a few splinters.

The doctor calmly said, staring directly at the daleks eyestalk

"you've been listening in to us this whole time, haven't you?" in a complete monotone, watching for the slightest movement.

"Huh?" jack interrupted.

"shhhhh…..not you jack" calmly putting a finger to his lips.

After a small pause it replied

"I WAS NOT-"it screeched "I WAS NOT A-SLEEP…. I WAS RES-TING" a dim blue light began to glow from the end of the eye stalk, and it lifted its head to stare at him with a single, penetrating eye.

The doctor cursed under his breath in a number of languages, mostly third world Swahili.

Jack said incredulously

"You have GOT to be kidding me"


End file.
